Mindfulness and Success…For Who
I have been successful from a career perspective, but not as successful as I wanted to be and I don’t have a bank balance with 7 digits in it, nor will I. That is not what I’m working for. Wait, I’m not a success I guess, I’m just one of the hopeful dreamers. What qualifies me to write an article on success then? I have found something that has enriched my life and others and made me a better human being, taking away the fear that was driving my striving. My truth is this, learn to seek the best for others you work with and for and you might just change the world and you will always find success.
It just depends on your definition of success. Your life will look radically different than living for yourself, but will it be better? Better for who is the question. You will find that the benefits living this way come back to you in many more positive and unexpected ways and your control of your life will always be challenged. How about building services and tools to connect and empower people to live the most full and loving lives they can?! When you talk about business and love, people cringe. Is a business based on love still striving for maximum profit, I think not. I think that a business based on love sees its profit in the lives changed and ultimately enabled to reach out more to love others. What is the point of having it all for yourself if you are miserable with a wake of wrecked lives behind you? Forget the lie you are being told, that everyone benefits by you living all out selfishly. All that does is harness the worst in us. Build what for who’s benefit? You may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m in great company and definitely not the only one, there is another way.
These days mindfulness and meditation are being pushed a lot, especially in Silicon Valley and in software development, to achieve personal success and productivity. People are looking to these practices to help them just keep things straight with all the distractions. Clear your mind and center your thoughts, quiet the storm, be present in the moment, focus so that…you can make a lot of money?! The successful or wannabe mogul wants any tool to help give them the edge, but at what price? I love that people are turning to things to quiet their minds, they may not like what they see and hear in themselves, I didn’t. Intention matters, I think the quality of the product and process used to build it and ultimate benefit for consumers, comes from the intention it was created with. If you want to create a cutting edge tool to take advantage of the latency in every stock market trade, good for you, how clever, but for who’s and what benefit? Your bigger house? Are we better as human beings with all this striving for success with no limits? How about we realize we have enough and with that realization open up an entirely new and I think ultimately better and more fulfilling self sustaining life.
In my experience, unless you increase your reach and focus outward, all that mental and emotional exercise to perfect yourself is for not and ends with you smaller and more limited. We must break out of our own feedback loop and live connected to others. What prevents this, in my life, fear and pride, ultimately fear.
Fear of what people think about me.
Fear about having enough to pay bills, I didn’t need to create to start with.
Fear of not finding a life partner and having a family.
Fear of death and my life meaning nothing.
Step 1 to finding success, face and let go of your fears. Our society trains us to be expert consumers, our system is based on this. The status quo is to grow our economy enough to keep you distracted and living to pay debt. Is that all you want? Not me, the richness and joy in my life has grown proportionally with my focus away from and outside of myself and letting go of the fears that drive us. Until you master your fear, you can not grow. Why do any of this? I think ultimately everything we do is selfish, but is love or fear at the root of our actions?
Step 2 to finding success, start today moving away from this ‘Me’ centered life by considering the needs of others somehow in your life today. Reaching out of our need is very difficult. I thinks it’s true environment, self interest and genetic forces shape much of why we do things and that’s ok, it’s the fear that separates and destroys us. What is the opposite of that trust and love? Compare someone’s life driven by fear or love and the fearful one may have more digits in the bank account, but at what cost? If you are living for things out of fear using people for your own gain, I believe your life is totally set in the wrong direction. You may find success in monetary value, but have no peace or love. How many ruined families can attest to this? I know, mine and many of my friends were.
Step 3 to finding success, be mindful and present in the moment. If you commit yourself to be mindful, present and focused, be prepared for the fallout. You will be challenged to let go of the control you think you have, it’s an illusion anyway. You may find the only thing that ever really mattered in your life is the connections you had in your life built on other’s needs and love, not yours. You will find things can flow in and out of your life easily living in the moment, what is good stays, what is bad is washed away and you will find what you needed for today and that fear evaporates. What is there to fear if your life is in balance?
I think our biggest challenge in life is to let go of our fears and learn to love. You have to forgive yourself if you need to or others. You need to ask for help if you need it and you have to be there to help those around you. It’s a simple truth, focus more on others and less on you. Most real truth is simple, but it takes a lifetime to learn. Letting go of fear and pride and practicing being mindful and present in service to others is what I am committed to the rest of my life and I’m finding out, everything else seems to take care of itself. I don’t want to build things to just delight customers and make a lot of money, I want to help them live more loving connected lives challenging them to reach outside of themselves. How could I not find success living this way? I challenge you to consider your motivations for success and try to live the change you want to see.
